Crash! Landen’s Worst 10 Movies of 2002

I  have to say I must have been pretty good at dodging the crap in 2002. There are a few dogs at the bottom of the list, but once you get past#5 or 6, they become fairly watchable… I pondered Ballistic:Ecks vs. Sever… which may be the first time anyone ever gave that much thought to the Lucy Liu/Antonio Banderas epic crapfest… but that was actually better than what it’s given credit for. It’s not a good movie, but for the action genre, it’s adequate. The closest I could come to finding a #11 was Star Wars: Attack of The Clones and for me, that was DECIDEDLY better than The Phantom Menace. It wasn’t great by any stretch of the imagination, but it wasn’t  terrible, either… So without too much further commentary:

#10 Dragonfly (Very slow and predictable but I’ve seen MUCH worse.)
#9 Reign of Fire (Couldn’t get past the premise, but watchable if I’m in the right mood.)
#8 Hart’s War (Historically inaccurate and tedious. It helps that Bruce Willis is in the movie. Not a total waste of time.
#7 Insomnia (Neat premise, but Robin Williams is in ‘serious’ mode in a bad way and Pacino is in full-on ridiculously over-acting mode.  Swank was likeable in this, but a bad movie.)
#6 They (A pointless movie, but it’s watchable in parts.)
#5 Murder by Numbers (About here on my list is where the quality drops considerably.)
#4 Femme Fatale (Not even Rebecca Romijn making out with model actress Rie Rasmuessen could save this… And that’s saying A LOT.)
#3 The Eye (Had  one good re-occuring creepy scene on an elevator… Other than that; break out the Red Bull to stay awake.
#2 S1m0ne (Rachel Roberts is really nice to look at. This movie was not… And it’s the 2nd one on my list with Pacino. He was somewhat sedated in this.)
#1 Darkness (From the #2 spot to this one is a large gaping crevice of quality. A complete turd and that’s really sad, because I like Anna Pacquin. and wanted to like this movie.)
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4 Responses to “Crash! Landen’s Worst 10 Movies of 2002”

  1. Crash! Landen Says:

    Sure, but if I haven’t seen them, can’t put them on the list. Master of Disguise almost goes on my list and I’ve only seen the trailer. ‘m willing to bet my 10 probably don’t match up with the sheer degradation of film that your 6 PROBABLY amount to, but that’s why avoided those.

  2. Bob Johnson Says:

    Oh I was well aware of what I doing but they are still far worse than some of the ones on here.

  3. Crash! Landen Says:

    I didn’t want to mention the Nolan part. I have seen the original. Insomnia is a better remake than ‘Vanishing’ was compared to the 2 foreign originals…

    But I think I was pretty selective that year and the ones from 6-10 on my list aren’t great, but they’re tolerable. Reign of Fire is a train wreck idea, but it’s funny how Bale and McConaughey take the situation so seriously. I actually like the fact that McConaughey did a lot of B films like this, Frailty (a good movie, though) and The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre (which maybe should make my 1994 Worst movie list)
    …But I avoided those 6 crap movies you mentioned. Felt sorry for Eddie Murphy, because I knew that was going to suck, but didn’t realize noone would see it. I think I have seen about 2 minutes of Rollerball, but with the exception of maybe Showtime you should have known better….

  4. Bob Johnson Says:

    I never finished watching Reign of Fire. I’ve attempted to 3 times yet I’ve fallen asleep every time, true story.

    Insomnia wasn’t great but I didn’t hate it. And if you can every catch the original Norwegian version its much stronger. I was more disappointed that this was Christopher Nolan’s follow up to Memento.

    And I completely forgot about Murder By Numbers. Holy crap was that terrible.

    Femme Fatale is awesome…..when you mute it and fast forward to the naked sexy parts. And then turn it off.

    Though I don’t disagree with some on here I think you missed a shit load of god awful piles. These would easily made my worst 10.

    The Adventures Pluto Nash
    Bad Company
    Master of Disguise
    Showtime
    Rollerball
    Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

    Thoughts?

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